Some young people resist counselling as it seems like giving in to the notion that they’ve failed as a person. They’ve fought hard to stand by themselves and be their own person and the idea of having to give up on this belief in themselves adds further pain to their situation.
Sometimes I meet someone when something or things has pushed them over an edge where they can no longer cope but that does not mean that they want to be in counselling.
Sovereignty is a word that has been talked a lot this year and I am going to stretch its sense to say that going to counselling may feel like giving up on one’s own personal sovereignty. It is understandable that young people can be fiercely determined not to it up.
It seems particularly unfair for young people to have to resort to outside help. They can understand that adults live more complicated lives that involve big responsibilities and choices but it shouldn’t be something they need. They can feel angry and sad about what happened to their right to an ordinary childhood and teenage years.
There are no solutions to this unfairness. All I can offer is a place where this reluctance to be in counselling is respected and my commitment to look at the things that each individual wants to look at in their own time at their own pace.